WAYS TO ADJUST THE SETTINGS

In front of me is a Zoom screen, now an ordinary part of our lives. We’re talking, watching each other’s reflections on the screen. Our voices travel through cables and emerge from a speaker. How strange. Is this really what we call communication?

How does one do it? Can I do it?

I’m trying, but it’s not working…

That’s how our conversation flows. Meanwhile, I’m holding a remote control, constantly tweaking the settings.

"Let me lower the temperature a little… No, maybe I should switch it to dehumidify… No, that’s not enough either. Let me just fix the vents in one direction."

“Why all this effort?” they ask.

“The air conditioning is too strong, it’s bothering me.”

“Hmm… isn’t your computer a laptop?”

“Yes.”“Is there another spot in the room?”

“Of course.”

“Then why don’t you move?”

"Oh, right… one second."

I move to another spot, and suddenly—problem solved.

“Remember the question you asked earlier? This is your answer.”

Silence.

Then it clicks.

"I see… You’re saying: when something bothers me, I grab the remote and keep adjusting the settings, searching for the right balance—one that won’t disturb me. But all I really need to do is change my own position. If necessary, I just need to create some distance. The settings of others are not in my control. I can’t adjust them. But what I can control is my own stance, my own space, my own boundaries. And I should do that the way you always remind me—by expressing myself. Clearly. Simply. In a way that is easy to understand. Yes. No. I want this. I don’t want that.”

“Exactly. Life gives us small gestures, little scenes, as clues. Just like this moment. Just pause. Observe. Listen. Then, read. Read what is happening. Read the experience. The more you read, the more you’ll understand. The more you understand, the more you’ll know. And the more you know, the more you’ll become.”

“Become what?”

“Yourself. The greatest gift you’ve been given—YOU. To be you. To be fully yourself. To be free from all the hidden expectations of ‘you should be this’ or ‘you must be that.’

To be an authentic YOU. As unique as your fingerprint, with no duplicate in the world.

One of a kind.